sounds painful D:

Original post shows pictures of Tokio Hotel members frolicking around in the water on vacation.

hotforbabyleg 2009-01-01 11:50 am (local) (link)

my clitoris just retracted into my body and it is never coming out

___unluckystars 2009-01-01 11:53 am (local) (link)

this is the single greatest thing i have ever, ever read

little_gillies 2009-01-01 11:55 am (local) (link)

Lmfao. That's kind of the best description ever.

Thanks to Sarah for the submission.

they're easy, "like taking candy from a baby"

Original post has various pictures of Miley Cyrus and boyfriend Justin Gaston together.

potentia_libero 2009-01-14 07:37 pm (local) (link)

omfg im almost 21 and i dont have a boyfriend i feel so ~lonely~

miss_gulch 2009-01-14 07:41 pm (local) (link)

go hang out at a high school like gaston does. hs kids will fuck anyone who can drive them to the mall.

javabreeze 2009-01-14 08:09 pm (local) (link)

lmao

klpaige 2009-01-15 08:56 am (local) (link)

lmfao gastons a pedo.

Thanks to Ashley for the submission!

like most of ONTD

Original post has a list of "35 Celebrities Who Smoke Pot."

cassie_epstein 2009-02-02 03:18 pm (local) (link)

You're forgetting Jen Aniston and brad Pitt. I think if the whole world smoked weed, it'd be a much more peopleful place and I am a non-weed smoker, lol.

chana_snodofsky 2009-02-02 03:23 pm (local) (link)

"peopleful" are you sure you're not high now?

dirtyknife 2009-02-02 05:12 pm (local) (link)

LOL MTE

natvach 2009-02-02 05:27 pm (local) (link)

I just laughed so loud I cackled like a witch.

Thanks to mechanicaltoy for the submission!

conversations with ourselves

Original post: According to Seattle Times, Pearl Jam guitarist Mike McCready suffers from Crohn's disease, which is "a painful gastrointestinal disorder that can make finding restrooms an extremely urgent and embarrassing task."

LJ user funkyplatypus carries on a "conversation" with himself to the amusement of other ONTD-ers.

funkyplatypus 2009-02-01 10:07 pm (local) (link)

I guess you could say Mike has a BROWN disease... A AHAHA AHAHAHA HA AHHA

funkyplatypus 2009-02-01 10:07 pm (local) (link)

ok only Pearl Jam fans will get that.

funkyplatypus 2009-02-01 10:08 pm (local) (link)

and even then it's not that funny.

funkyplatypus 2009-02-01 10:08 pm (local) (link)

I love Pearl Jam.

barkee 2009-02-01 10:12 pm (local) (link)

lol @ your monologue

love_gingers 2009-02-01 10:26 pm (local) (link)

lmao at your rambling + icon + username

houseclouds 2009-02-01 10:39 pm (local) (link)

LOL i am dying rn

Thank you Shelby and Kathryn for submitting this.